Home Delivered Harassment

Nearly two decades ago I declined “Caller ID” and opted for “Number Blocking.”  You see, I was brought up to believe that private things should remain private and that included phone numbers.  I just couldn’t expose my number for anyone to see.  Suppose I called a business and they used my number to (gasp!) call me back.  

Fast forward 20 years.  My initial attempt to avoid unsolicited calls has turned into the primary reason I get them.  Well maybe not the reason I get them, but definitely the reason I answer them.   It turns out caller ID is a useful tool for distinguishing between callers you know and those you don’t, like, say… solicitors.

Besides, solicitors don’t care if you’ve called their business before or not.  They don’t even care if you’re on the “Do Not Call” list that I keep signing up for.  Sure they’ll apologize and hang up, but they’ll call again.  One business was so lame; they used their name, apologized, and then called back each week after promising to remove me from their list. After the 4^th week I threatened harassment charges.  So far it seems to have slowed them down.  But there are some whose rudeness boarders on the edge of insanity.  And yes, I have tried hanging up on them.  One jerk called me back and hung up repeatedly for almost an hour.  I nearly went crazy listening to: ring, outgoing message, dial-tone, repeat. What did I do to deserve this home delivery harassment?  I answered my phone.  (Sigh) 

Did you know that there are over 1 million registered charities in the USA?  I’m on the calling list for 81% of them, and the rest have my phone number.  (Ugh.)  Most hire professional fundraising agencies that keep anywhere from 20% to 65% of the money they raise.  Why would I want to PAY people to interrupt me twice a day AND make me burn my dinner or track across my freshly washed floor?

And dealing with the professional fundraiser is a whole other ballgame.    Usually I try my acting abilities on them, giving my own sad story of why I can’t help.  Seems they’re trying out their own acting abilities.  This is evident from their poor reading of the script that is obviously in front of them.  Most could benefit from an improvisational class… or an actual human conversation.  Here’s an excerpt from a recent phone call. 

“I’m sorry, I don’t have any money.”

“Well ma’am, we’re a non-profit organization and exempt from the ‘do-not-call’ laws.”    What!?  Does their exemption status magically change my financial situation?  The sad part is I’ve had this same conversation several times! Even more maddening are the callers with actual people skills.  You know the ones; sweet old man or southern belle?  They get me for at least 15 or 20 bucks every time. (Sheez)

So that leaves us with automated solicitors.  How is that legal?  It has got to be one of the biggest violations of the “do-not-call” laws yet.  I’d like to track down every person who subscribes to this violation of human sanity rights and call their homes twice a day.  But, there would be no “press 3 to unsubscribe” button, as if one really exists.  No…and my message wouldn’t be wordy, just a simple old-fashion air horn. 

Well, I’m glad I got that off of my chest.  Gotta go switch to caller ID now.

Remember; be kind to each other and thank you for reading My Rant!

Smoked Signals

What is it about men and signals?  Oh sure, they accuse women of “mixed signals,” but at least you have an indication (or two) of what’s going on inside our heads.

For instance, I was exiting a parking lot with a very wide driveway the other day where a car waited in the middle.  Being in the middle of the drive way, I naturally (nat·u·ral·ly, adverb 1. in a natural or normal manner, 2. by nature; innately or inherently, 3. of course; as would be expected; needless to say) assumed he was turning left. Of course whenever you use the word “assume” you’re admitting to some degree of uncertainty.  Why the uncertainty?  He didn’t have his signal on.

Now, given my natural assumption, I pulled alongside to the right giving the clear impression that I intended to turn right.  Why clear you ask?   Because I did everything the law told me I’m supposed to do before making a right hand turn.  I began at the edge closest to my right and used my right turn signal.

After doing this it became clear that the man to my left wanted to turn right and needed to do so immediately.  I came to realized this when he eked out into heavy traffic, squeezing between the row of cars waiting to turn right and my front bumper.  Obviously he had a thing or two to teach me.  I’m not even going to touch on the fact that he made the next available right turn back into the parking lot he just exited. (BTW, no cars ever came up behind either of us while in the parking lot driveway.)  I’m just saying.

But it’s not just this incident.  There are thousands of people rushing in and out of traffic without ever signaling.  I’ve asked a couple of people I know (men) why they don’t signal.  The common response goes something like this, “If I signal the other person will know I want over.”

Oh, I get…..huh???

Evidently once you reveal your intentions, the rest of the people on the road conspire against you to keep you from getting to where you want to be.  But if that were true, why do signal using people, get to where they’re going?

Ok, ok… CALM DOWN!  I know there really are people out there who intentionally speed up as soon as they realize you want over or are about to pass them.  What the non-signalers don’t seem to realize is that signaling is a courtesy to the other courteous drivers, not a request for permission.  You signal, you move over or turn.   It’s like shouting, “Here I come, good luck everybody else!”

The fact is that cars are thousand pound deathtraps on wheels.  Let’s stop the conspiracy games and using our cars to teach others lessons.  Why not try the angrily shaken fist (mind your fingers please) or the sorrowful face on the shaking head?   Why there must be dozens of ways of displaying your dissatisfaction with the rest of the world that do not involve endangering other people’s lives.

Well... my life was never in danger but, I was in danger of having to deal with my insurance company and auto repair people.  A fate not to be wished on others. 

Now I know I took a jab at men; but women can be idiots too.  (Did I just call men idiots? Oh well.)  As a matter of fact I recently read a comment from a female friend on Facebook who admitted to regularly multitasking while driving.  If she’s reading this, love ya but you’ve got to stop.  Thank God responses to her post were less than enthusiastic. 

Well I’m glad I got that off of my chest.  Remember; look out for each other and thank you for reading MY RANT.